I was just a boy when the infidels came to my village in their Blackhawk helicopters. The infidels fired at the oil fields and they lit up like the eyes of Allah. Burning oil rained down from the sky and cooked everything it touched. I could only hide myself and cry as my goats were consumed by the fiery black liquid death. In the midst of the chaos, I could swear that I heard my goats screaming for help. As quickly as they had come, the infidels were gone. It was on that day I put a jihad on them. And if you don't believe it, then you'd better kill me now, because I'll put a jihad on you, too.

Suddenly every mp3 on the intarnets is no longer an mp3 or just a regular old file, its a cumtastic podcast. If you were gay enough to buy into stupid pretty white DIGITAL AUDIO PLAYERS that they don't even want you playing mp3's on, then now you can get in a big circle with all your friends and celebrate how unique and esoteric your crap DAP is, and how your also propably dumb enough to drive a beetle.

I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast.

Smoke Weed Every Day

Your mamma's so fat she has been called morbitally obese

if this is something you think that is funny or if you think this is a hoax, you should be ashamed of yourself. i can guarantee if you say that in public, people are going to kick your ass. on top of that, this is the prime reason why men are labeled as arrogant jackasses and you are the leading cause of it all, so next time you look in a mirror, think how much it would hurt to have your eyes gouge out and your tongue sheared off, cause quite frankly, i would do so.

What did the goofoff say to the serious person? Why so serious¿

Step on my foot, and ill break both your legs and ram them up your ass.

English is your second language, isn't it? You don't have a first. Your post is an orgy of stultifying cacophonous verbal depravity; an exercise in literary impotence, and an offense to all of good taste and decency. It's just as well you can type, for if you had to speak your mind, you'd be speechless. If ignorance were a disability, you'd get the full pension. Anyway, who was talking to you or even taking you under consideration? As Robert Wilensky said: "We've all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true."

Whats worse than your christmas tree catching on fire christmas eve? Your christmas tree catching on fire on christmas

If you are willing to buy real estate, you will have to get the loans. Moreover, my father commonly takes a student loan, which supposes to be the most reliable.

just fyi: I have relatives from not so far back that were nimibian tribesman. they happen to have fought lions just to become warriors. I dont know what you know about lions but they aren't like your average cat. I bet you would absolutely shit yourself if you ever saw a real life lion.. especially if you were only holding a sharpened stick and you were naked. come talk to me when some of your family members have gone on the zambutu bibjano; aka the trial of life. until you have done half the shit that they have maybe you shouldnt even talk to me like this. I know you think you're hard and shit but guess what pal.. u arent'. now go grow some namibian genes and we'll talk about this shit for real

after telling someone on a forum to stop whining: "motha fukker lemme tell u wot...were i from you say dat shit you get pop capped dropped and then ur whole family git stuck. i got a gat wit hollo points and they all 4 u."

DO NOT DRINK AND DRIVE OR YOU MIGHT SPILL THE DRINK. :D Source: Collection of Cool WhatsApp Status

You think you so slick with all your digs at my small Asian penis, but you didn't think this one through because you are no match for my superior Asian brain! I read your IP, mwahaha! My Mac makes job like this no problem. Being Chinese means I am kung-fu, motherbitch, and I about to go all Bruce Lee on your ASS! You need to watch out who you order your chicken chow mein from, because when you hear the glass break, enter the dragon! I come through your window! Ha, we Chinese come up with genius plan for every occasion ... you think you pay me for take-out, but you actually pay me to beat you like little bitch! Do I still have small dick? Huh? I make you eat your own shit! Ho0o0o0o!

You are about as entertaining as a child's inflatable punching toy. You bop it, it springs back, you bop it again and you forget it ever existed. It slowly deflates in an unused corner, then one day you throw it away. There's nothing wrong with you that couldn't be cured with a little Prozac and a polo mallet, or, better yet, suicide. Maybe you wouldn't read like such a pathetic loser if you weren't afflicted with mental retardation; if your weren't so fat that when you stand on the weighing scale, it reads: "Sorry, we don't weigh livestock.", or if you didn't have a face like a bulldog chewing a stinging nettle while taking a constipated dump in a heat wave. Who am I kidding? You would. In future, wake up the dozy peglegged hamster operating that wheel-powered brain of yours before you start typing.

what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul

lol

I just stole your car, set fire to your couch, humped your girlfriend, ate your last piece of pizza, drank your last beer, shit on your coat, called your father a dingle berry, smeared KY jelly all over your toilet seat, called the police and told them you were mean to me, broke your calculator, made a flip book out of your post-it notes, wrote obscene messages on your driveway in sidewalk chalk, mixed up all your dress socks so you have one navy blue and one black one, left your refrigerator door open, left your freezer door open, left your front door open, asked your priest to excommunicate you, rifled through your mail but didn't find anything interesting so I put it back, switched your calender with a 1996 one, changed your screen saver to the windows logo, switched all your clocks back 1 hour, licked all your stamps and put them on the ceiling of your stolen car, made a random post trying to make you cry, invited twelve stray cats into your place and watching the sit on the burning couch, run up your long distance bill asking china if they really loved white rice, played darts with your neighbor, the dart board was the side of your house, I won, vacuumed your carpet then dumped the bag on your bed, set your bed on fire to watch the dust burn, it wasn't that interesting so I took a fire extinguisher and put it out, watched the couch burn some more cats, invited a stray dog over to chase the burning cats, got hungry again after eating your last piece of pizza so I ordered another one, its in your refrigerator but the doors still open, called your work and told them you died in a horrible gay experiment, told the same thing to your dad.

"If I ever see you on craiglist again...ever, I am going to make sure you never sell shit again online from the ass whooping I am going to give you. I am sick and tired of phaggots like you posting shit on craiglist and when it comes down to selling shit, you flake. So listen here ASSCLOWN. If I ever see you advertise one more thing on here, I am going to personally find you and beat the living shit out of you. I'm going to make sure you have a reason not to sell shit on craiglist ever again. You'll be in a wheelchair the rest of your life wondering where you went wrong. If I ever hear of you on here...you better make sure you move states. Because if I find you...like I said...I'll be sure to give you a reason to flake and not to make it to my doorstep with whatever it is you are selling ****.

Go take a flying f*ck at a rolling doughnut

Did I just write, that makes me your bitch? XD Best day ever. Hey any girls want me as their bitch? All you gotta do is let me pierce your sweet virgin ass with my PENIIIIIIIIIS!!!!!! Pussy is okay too, but not mouth, for blowjobs you gotta be at least three of you, you need to be hot, and fight over my cock like genuinely, like "HEY ITS MY TURN NOW! I WANT THE WHOLE OF IT! HEY! YOU SAID I COULD HAVE THE SAUCE THIS TIME You know etc, you done it thousands of times you little scanks you... WITH MEEEE! Still love ya though ;) I AM CAPTAAAAIN VAAAAA.... GIIIINAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! Or Nero the Moral Man, works too, its not my superhero name anymore, because I saved the world like 10.000 times in secrecy (because I enter those red telephone boxes which are only in museums now) And I fought SEX LUTHOR! The femme fatale that thought she could ENDURE SEX LONGER THAN I! SHE WON! EVERYBODY WIIIIINS! EEEVERYOBODYY WIIIIIIISH! Well she used Dicktonite on me so it does not count, then I inserted my cock into the sun, and SHE GOT AN ORGAMS THAT SUCKED ALL MY... CCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM Into her vagina and... Fuck I am gonna be a dad... NEEEEEVEEEEEER! Anyway, threats I am a thug, AND I AM GOING TO BECOME YOUR BITCH! DO YOU HEAR ME MASTER! YOUUUUR BITCH!

so just go wash it you dirty fucking piece of shit oh my fucking god its gonna rain fresh water all over my clean car is this some kind of fucking joke you are just a lazy fucking piece of shit and finding excuses to be a lazy peice of shit why shave youre hairs gonna grow back tomorrow why wash your fuckin dick shits just gonna get covered in pussy slime again tomorrow shut the fuck up and go wash your fucking truck or get the fuck off this website right fucking now

Okay, I'm going to do this the correct way. Shut up or I will beat your ass. Enough said.

ethugtxt

Electronic thug. A pale, pimple faced, skinny white kid who would most likely burn up if he came into contact with natural sunlight. Spends all of his time threatening people over the internet to compensate for his lack of a life and hatred of humanity for not accepting him.